During an afternoon, a beautiful blond woman named Olga and a handsome man named Andrew Squervil are laying on a bed in Olga’s apartment, having very recently completed an intimate encounter.
“That was wonderful, Andrew,” Olga says, speaking in her ultra-sexy, Russian-sounding accent.
“I enjoyed it too,” Andrew says.
“I’m so glad I agreed to take you back as my boyfriend,” Olga says.
“Me too,” Andrew says.
“To think, not that long ago, I was kicking you in the face repeatedly after finding out you’d cheated on me,” Olga says. “And now, here we are, together again!”
“Yes, I’m really glad you forgave me for my past infidelity, Olga,” Andrew says.
Some time ago, while he was in a nightclub, Andrew met two beautiful women who were there together. The women’s names were Olga and Inna. They were friends who lived in the same apartment. After conversing with Olga and Inna for over an hour, Andrew found that there was so much he liked about Olga and Inna: their sexy, foreign accents; their pretty faces; their shapely bodies; Olga’s long, straight, blond hair; Inna’s long, wavy, brown hair; their cruel, arrogant, selfish personalities; the sexy, sharp stiletto shoes they were wearing; and, most importantly of all to Andrew, their apparently well-funded bank accounts. Andrew knew it would not be in his best interests to romantically pursue both women simultaneously, but his desire for both Olga and Inna was too strong.
Over the next several days, going against common sense, Andrew initiated a secret romantic relationship with Olga and a secret romantic relationship with Inna. Neither woman was aware of Andrew’s romantic relationship with the other woman. Andrew had manipulated both women into keeping their romantic relationships with Andrew a secret from each other.
At the beginning of Andrew’s romantic relationship with Olga, Andrew said to Olga: “We should keep our relationship a secret for now. Inna is deeply infatuated with me. It would devastate her to find out that I’m in a relationship with you, her best friend.”
At the beginning of Andrew’s romantic relationship with Inna, Andrew said to Inna: “We should keep our relationship a secret for now. Olga is deeply infatuated with me. It would devastate her to find out that I’m in a relationship with you, her best friend.”
For a period of time, Andrew successfully carried on his secret affairs with Olga and Inna. He was very happy during that time.
Then one day, perhaps inevitably, Olga and Inna simultaneously found out about Andrew’s duel deceptions. In response to this discovery, the two women pummeled him mercilessly and broke up with him.
But now, Andrew is back together with Olga, having convinced her that he is a changed man, and is in love with her, and only her.
While laying on the bed with Olga in Olga’s apartment, Andrew says: “What happened to Inna?”
“Inna and I had a falling out,” Olga says. “She moved out of the apartment.”
“Was it me that caused the falling out?” Andrew says, secretly amused by the idea that he destroyed a friendship between two people.
“No,” Olga says. “It was something else. It had to do with an anklet.”
“An anklet?” Andrew says, feeling a vague sense of dread. Inexplicably, he has had multiple bad experiences involving beautiful women’s anklets, so the mere utterance of the word ‘anklet’ by a beautiful woman causes him to feel a vague sense of dread.
“Yes, an anklet,” Olga says. “It belonged to me. It was very valuable. I kept it in a jewelry box under my bed. I only wore it on very special occasions. Inna saw the anklet a few times, and said she really, really liked it. One day, not that long ago, Inna and I were getting ready to go to a very exclusive party. And I decided to wear my anklet for the occasion. But when I opened my jewelry box, the anklet was gone! I accused Inna of stealing it. She denied doing so, but I know she was lying! She had wanted that anklet so much! So I continued to accuse her, and we got into a big, hostile argument, and she ended up moving out. I haven’t spoken to her since. But not that long ago, I saw her walking down a street. And she was wearing an anklet that looked very much like the one I had! I think it was my anklet!”
“Are you sure?” Andrew says.
“I think so,” Olga says. “I’m fairly sure it was my anklet she was wearing.”
“Did you confront her about it?” Andrew says.
“No,” Olga says. “I should have.”
“It’s terrible that Inna stole your anklet,” Andrew says, secretly amused. “Inna is a terrible woman.”
Andrew is secretly amused because he knows that it was actually him who stole Olga’s anklet. Prior to the day that he was dumped by Olga and Inna, Andrew stole the anklet from the jewelry box. He later sold it for money. It wasn’t the first time Andrew had stolen from a girlfriend.
“Oh Andrew,” Olga says. “All this talk about Inna and the anklet is upsetting me. Make me forget these horrible memories.”
Andrew proceeds to have another intimate encounter with Olga.
I deserve this happiness, Andrew thinks incorrectly.
The next day, in Olga’s apartment, Olga says to Andrew: “Andrew, all that talk about Inna and the anklet yesterday really upset me. I can’t get it out of my mind. I want you to do something about it.”
“You mean you want me to satisfy you again?” Andrew says, about to start undressing.
“No,” Olga says. “I want you to go to Inna’s apartment and get the anklet back for me.”
“How so?” Andrew says.
“Do whatever you need to do,” Olga says. “But I want it back.”
“Olga, this is ridiculous,” Andrew says. “You should just forget about the anklet. You need to move on.”
Olga stares at Andrew suspiciously for a few seconds. Then she says: “Inna told me she thought you stole the anklet.”
“What?!” Andrew says, feigning surprise.
“On the day that I found out my anklet was missing from the jewelry box, Inna told me she thought you stole the anklet,” Olga says. “She said: ‘I bet it was that sleazy loser Andrew Squervil who stole it.’.”
“That’s ridiculous!” Andrew says.
“Maybe Inna was right!” Olga says. “Maybe you did steal it and now you’re just trying to cover up the truth!”
“No!” Andrew says. “No! It was Inna!”
“You’re lying!” Olga says. “That’s why you don’t want to go to Inna’s apartment to get my anklet: because you know my anklet isn’t there! I’m going to call the police and have you arrested!”
Olga begins walking toward a nearby telephone. Andrew knows that if the police investigate, they’ll easily find all kinds of evidence of his sale of Olga’s stolen anklet, and Andrew will be doomed.
“Wait!” Andrew says. “Okay, I’ll do it!”
“You’ll do what?” she says.
“I’ll go to Inna’s apartment and get your anklet back from her,” Andrew says.
“You will?” Olga says.
“Yes, if only to prove that I didn’t steal your anklet,” Andrew says.
“So you’ll really get it back for me?” Olga says.
“Yes,” Andrew says. “By this time tomorrow, your anklet will be out of Inna’s evil clutches and back around your lovely ankle, where it belongs.”
“Oh Andrew, you’re so good to me,” Olga says.
She kisses him.
Later, after a failed attempt to get Olga’s anklet back from the person he sold it to, Andrew enters the apartment building that Inna currently resides in. He goes to the front door of Inna’s apartment. He knocks on the door. As expected, no one answers. Inna is supposed to be away at work now.
Andrew begins trying to break the door open. His plan is to steal the anklet that Olga saw Inna wearing, as it apparently bears a very strong resemblance to Olga’s anklet.
Unfortunately for Andrew, Inna suddenly appears in the hallway, back from work earlier than expected.
“Andrew Squervil!” Inna says, speaking in her ultra-sexy, Russian-sounding accent. “What are you doing here?”
Andrew stops and turns around to face Inna, unsure if she saw him trying to break the door open.
“Hello, Inna,” he says, acting innocent. “It’s good to see you.”
Andrew notices that Inna is wearing a gold, diamond-encrusted anklet on her ankle. To Andrew, it looks identical to the anklet he stole from Olga. He assumes that the anklet Inna is wearing today is the same one that Olga had seen Inna wearing.
“Don’t play innocent with me, Andrew,” Inna says. “I know why you came here.”
Andrew gulps. “You do?” he says.
She smiles seductively. “Yes,” she says. “And I can’t say I blame you. Many men desire my spectacular body. Even though I think you’re a sleazy loser, I still do find you attractive. I don’t want you to be my boyfriend anymore, but you will be an ideal disposable lover.”
She begins kissing him.
Later, Andrew and Inna are laying on a bed in Inna’s apartment, having very recently completed an intimate encounter.
“That was great,” Inna says. “Now get out.”
“Okay,” Andrew says.
A few minutes later, Andrew exits Inna’s apartment. In the apartment building’s hallway, he takes Inna’s anklet out of his pocket. Unbeknownst to Inna, Andrew discreetly removed the anklet from Inna’s ankle while she was distracted by their intimate encounter. He hopes Inna does not notice that her anklet is missing for a long, long time.
Suddenly, he hears Inna say, from in her apartment: “MY ANKLET IS MISSING! WHERE IS MY ANKLET? COME BACK HERE, ANDREW! I KNOW YOU STOLE MY ANKLET!”
Andrew begins running away.
Later, he arrives at Olga’s apartment. Olga lets him into the apartment.
Andrew hands her the anklet he stole from Inna. “Here’s your anklet,” Andrew says.
Olga begins examining the anklet. “How did you get it?” she says.
“I broke into Inna’s apartment while she was away at work,” Andrew says, lying. “Now Olga, I need your help with something. There’s a possibility that Inna may call the police and accuse me of stealing the anklet. I’m going to need an alibi.”
“Why would she suspect you of stealing the anklet?” Olga says, still inspecting the anklet. “You said she was away at work when you were there.”
“Yes, you’re right,” Andrew says. “But nonetheless, I want to make sure I have an alibi if necessary. If anyone asks, I was with you in your apartment all day today.”
Olga stops examining the anklet. “This isn’t my anklet,” she says.
“What?!” Andrew says.
“This isn’t my anklet,” Olga says.
“What are you talking about?” Andrew says. “Of course it’s your anklet!”
“It’s not,” Olga says.
“It’s virtually identical to the anklet you had,” Andrew says. “It’s golden. It’s diamond-encrusted. It’s your anklet!”
“It looks very similar, but there were only three diamonds encrusted on my anklet, whereas this anklet has four diamonds encrusted on it,” Olga says. “Wait… How did you know that this anklet looks so much like mine?”
“What do you mean?” Andrew says.
“Just now, you said that this anklet is ‘virtually identical’ to the anklet I had,” Olga says. “You knew that my anklet was golden and diamond-encrusted. How would you know that? I had never shown you my anklet, and I never told you that it was golden and diamond-encrusted. So how did you know that this anklet looks so much like the one I had?”
Andrew gulps. “Olga, I can explain,” he says.
“Explain it to the police,” Olga says.
She grabs a nearby frying pan and whacks Andrew on the head with it, causing him to become unconscious and fall to the ground.
Olga proceeds to call the police.
Later, Andrew wakes up. There are two police officers standing over him. They arrest him for both his theft of Olga’s anklet and his theft of Inna’s anklet.
A few days later, Andrew’s trial is about to begin. Unfortunately for Andrew, the judge assigned to his trial is one of his ex-lovers, a beautiful woman named Sindra. Like most of Andrew’s ex-lovers, Sindra now despises Andrew.
At the beginning of the trial, Sindra says to Andrew, in a tone of mocking cruelty: “Well, well, well… Andrew Squervil: the legend continues.”
Sindra judges Andrew guilty and sentences him to a form of incarceration known as the Chamber of Misery.
Olga and Inna reconcile with each other and forget all about Andrew.