A Celebration

Today, on the 334th floor of a building that is the headquarters of a very successful corporation that manufactures and sells popular honey products, a male employee named Josef is sitting in his cubicle, toiling away on a boring project.

A beautiful female co-worker, Priscilla, stops by Josef’s cubicle. “Hello, Josef,” Priscilla says.

“Hello, Priscilla,” Josef says, overwhelmed by Priscilla’s beauty as usual.

“Olivia told me to tell you to meet her in her office,” Priscilla says.

“Really?” Josef says, confused. “Why would Olivia want to meet with me?”

“I don’t know,” Priscilla says. “But it must be important. Good luck!”

Priscilla turns and begins walking away. Josef can’t help but gaze at her backside as she is walking away.

A few minutes later, on the building’s 567th floor, Josef enters the office of Olivia. Olivia is the owner and president of the honey corporation. She is fat. Josef does not find her attractive.

“You wanted to see me?” Josef says.

“Yes, Josef,” Olivia says. “I want to speak with you about your future in this organization. Let me ask you a question: what, above all else, do you want?”

Josef thinks: I want to have an intimate encounter with Priscilla.

Josef says: “I want to further develop my career in your organization.”

“I’m glad that that’s your answer,” Olivia says. “Because I want to give you a promotion.”

“Really?” Josef says.

“Yes,” Olivia says. “But this promotion comes with a price.”

“What…” Josef says. “What is the price?”

Olivia smiles wickedly. She begins undressing and walking toward Josef.

Josef gulps. He wants to reject Olivia, but then an image of Priscilla blowing a kiss at him flashes in his mind. He knows that Priscilla might be very impressed with him if he gets a promotion.

Later that day, a newly-promoted Josef returns to the 334th floor. As he is walking toward his cubicle, he runs into Priscilla.

“Hi, Josef!” Priscilla says.

“Hi, Priscilla,” Josef says.

“I heard the news about your promotion!” Priscilla says. “Congratulations!”

“Thanks!” Josef says. Then, feeling very confident, Josef says: “Perhaps you and I could meet after work to celebrate my promotion.”

“Yes, that sounds lovely,” Priscilla says.

Later, in the late evening, Josef and Priscilla are in the bedroom of Priscilla’s apartment. They are in the process of celebrating Josef’s promotion via an intimate encounter. However, something is very wrong.

“Josef, what’s the matter?” Priscilla says. “Don’t you find me attractive?”

“Yes, of course I do,” Josef says. “But… I can’t stop thinking of Olivia!”

“What?” Priscilla says. “I don’t understand!”

“I can’t get the image of her fat, disgusting body out of my mind!” Josef says. “It’s making it impossible for me to… ‘celebrate’ with you. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to rid my mind of that horrible image of Olivia. And if I can’t get that image of her out of my mind, then that means… I’ll never again be able to…”

“Oh no!” Priscilla says.

Josef wants to cry.