An Unfortunate Coincidence for Unfortunate Andrew

During an afternoon, in a city largely considered to be a utopia, a sleazy man named Andrew Squervil is walking on a street, heading toward his crummy apartment. Andrew is having a bad day. Earlier today, he failed to con a rich woman into marriage for her money. Despite Andrew’s efforts, he was unable to trick her into falling in love with him. She saw Andrew for what he really is: a sleazy, selfish loser.

As Andrew is walking on the street, he wonders if he is cursed. Lately, it seems as if everything is going wrong for him.

Then, as if the universe is confirming Andrew’s suspicion, Andrew sees a sight that causes him to stop: a woman from his past named Dominica. Dominica is a tall, very muscular brunette. Andrew encountered Dominica during two of his previous misadventures. At the conclusion of each of those misadventures, Dominica pummeled Andrew mercilessly. Andrew can still remember the painful feeling of Dominica’s meaty fists smashing into his face over and over again.

At the moment, Dominica is walking on the street and has not yet noticed Andrew.

Andrew, standing in stunned silence, remembers what Dominica said to him moments after her most recent pummeling of him: “If I ever see you again, anywhere on this planet, I’m going to pummel you mercilessly… again!”

And now Dominica stops, because she has seen Andrew. And now she is staring at Andrew, quickly recalling their previous encounters. And now Dominica has a furious look on her face and is running toward Andrew. She is running very fast, much faster than Andrew would have expected her to be.

Andrew begins running away from Dominica, but he already knows that it is a futile effort and that he will be reunited with her fists very shortly.

Dominica catches Andrew, then spins him around so that he is facing her. Up close, Andrew realizes that she is even larger and even more muscular than he remembered. She attacks him with a barrage of kicks to various parts of his body. Andrew falls to the ground. Dominica sits on top of him, pinning him down. She proceeds to pummel him mercilessly… again.

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